Speeding
While she was "flying" down the road yesterday (10 miles over the limit) a woman passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait.
The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, and with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, "What's your hurry?" To which she replied, "I'm late for work."
"Oh yeah," said the cop, "what do you do?"
"I'm a rectum stretcher," she responded.
The cop stammered, "A what? A rectum stretcher? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?"
"Well", she said, "I start by inserting one finger, then work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch, until it's about 6 feet wide."
"And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot asshole?" he asked.
"You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge."
Traffic Ticket $95.00
Court Costs $45.00
The Look on the Cop's Face... PRICELESS...
The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, and with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, "What's your hurry?" To which she replied, "I'm late for work."
"Oh yeah," said the cop, "what do you do?"
"I'm a rectum stretcher," she responded.
The cop stammered, "A what? A rectum stretcher? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?"
"Well", she said, "I start by inserting one finger, then work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch, until it's about 6 feet wide."
"And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot asshole?" he asked.
"You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge."
Traffic Ticket $95.00
Court Costs $45.00
The Look on the Cop's Face... PRICELESS...
posted by SD27 at 3:21 PM
5 Comments:
glad to see your back! :D
I love it! Seriously? This woman needs to go with me EVERYWHERE.
My luck, the cop would conviniently find a lb of some illegal substance, even though I don't do any of them. Then I would go to prison and learn what happens to funny boy rectum stretchers. This is gonna hurt...lol.
I have got to remember to tell this one to my cop friends when they piss me off te hehe
For everything else there's Mastercard.
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